Sometimes you just have to let off steam. This is the place.

Fashion is not for everyone!
January 13, 2006

Is it just me or............

Is there something REALLY WRONG with a man who is totally bald on his head but has a LONG PONY TAIL?

I mean, come on. I have been bald since my late twenties. Embrace it. Learn to live with it. I'll never understand it. Look in the mirror. Say to yourself, How do I look? You'll see the mirror say HILARIOUS!

How about guys wearing their pants so their drawers show and they can't move their legs a full step because their crotch is at their knees? I mean they walk 2 steps, pull their pants up, walk 2 more, pull their pants up. GUYS!!!! It's silly. Have you ever seen a big time VP of a company or executive wearing low rider baggy pants and his drawers hanging up his back? HECK NO. I always wonder how he can put his arm around his girl friend and take a walk. There's nothing better than holding hands or walking with your arm around the one you love. This is totally impossible with your pants at your knees.

Hey, I LOVE being different, but I DON'T let anyone dictate what I do or what I wear. I'm my own person and I'll wear what makes me look and feel good. Not what some rapper or some fashion model wears.

OH, by the way, LADIES (now don't get mad) BIG BOTTOM GIRLS SHOULD NOT WEAR HIP HUGGERS. As a matter of fact, those low riding pants all of the girls are wearing should be OUTLAWED! Yes OUTLAWED!

When us guys see a lady walk by, we of course smile and say hello and then we instinctively turn around and look at her hiney. It's built into us. Well, with these new pants GIRLS HAVE TWO HINEYS… a top hiney and a bottom hiney.

Ladies… two hineys are not as good as one nice, round shaking hiney. I know you see those skinny little fashion models wearing them but guess what, they don't have any HINEYS anyway.

Can I give you ladies a bit of "man thought"? We REALLY don't like our women too skinny. I know you ladies are obsessed with your weight but PLEASE don't take it to extremes. We like to ROLL, WRESTLE and to HUG. Worrying about whether you are going to break your girl friend in half while kidding around tickling and wrestling is not good. No one wants to snuggle and have hip bones poke them or have his arm go around you TWICE!

Oh, one last thing… those tattoos on your hiney are REALLY NICE; when you are in your twenties. Tattoos fade and STRETCH as you grow older and in twenty years or so, they won't be in fashion. Imagine the poor guy that got a "Disco Will Live Forever" tattoo back in the early 80's.

Even better: All of the Wu-Tang clan tattoos people are HIDING right now or Houston Oiler Football logos.

I have to stop now. I'm laughing so hard I can't breathe.

Just be yourself and don't follow. Do what is good for YOU!

Life is not perfect or women would have 3 boobies.
One would be in the back for use while slow dancing.

Your Pal

DBG